its me again lord

have you ever felt like you were going through a dry time with the lord? its a terrible feeling. i feel so far from God and i am not as excited in Him as i used to be. i need help, plain and simple help.
i decided to try to read my devotions ( i had broke my habit of doing this) and i didn't succeed. i found myself making excuses as to why i didn't need to do them or i had something more important to do. every time i went to do my devotions i would convince myself that i would do them some other time. it just kept getting pushed off.
i went to my mom about this and even my pastor but i still didn't feel any different. i would cry during certain songs in worship, but afterwards i would go out the church doors and not even think twice about what we sang. i remember going through a very rough time in my life (last year actually) and i realized during that time that i needed someone stronger than myself to help me through my trial. i got saved through that whole situation and after that i felt to in love with the lord, so ready to do anything he asked of me. a few years went by and my "need" for the lord had seemed unnecessary to me. it felt like i grew farther and farther from him.
i need help lord, plain and simple help.

i guess its safe to say your never coming back and i understand why you wouldn't want to i guess its up to me to find a way to get to you and i cant see you getting used to living in the midst of your perfection and I'm so lost how can you trust somewhere the sun is always shining and theres just one last thing that i have say as we reflect on the mess of all of this I've made it was cowardice that made me push you away i was so afraid cause you were so much better than me

Relient k

friends

is there a reason? does there have to be? its love you see. don't be blinded when light screams. passion is together. here you see us in the light, surrounded by darkness we fight. but don't forget what the war is for, what we fight for. its love the song the reason to scream, the reason to tell someone what we have seen what we have heard what we know. this passion that pours out is a fire that pours out. you feel the warmth rage over you. mercy falls over you. the world is a wall, don't fall. don't forget what He showed you, what you had. alive..we live..as one..one under grace.

after school?....

My dad works at our church office until five every day. our school is right next to the church office so guess where my brother and i go to sit for an extra two hours after school every day, yup his office. Boring boring boring boring (Jessica can attest to this) Its not as bad as it seems though. There are other people (Jess and Caleb and of course the annoying Matthew) who crusade with me through the boring two hours after a six to eight hour day of school (in short we are exhausted). any who we do the most random things that no normal teenager would dare to do in fear of a ruined reputation. such as:
1 climb trees to the very top and scream " i am not UN-normal "
2 run around a building playing a combination of hide and seek, break the rules, and run away tag (oh excuse me what the boys have forced us to call "man hunt")
3 try to figure out how to play amazing grace with a piano and drums.
4 and say something extremely random at least once.
well as you can see we have had quite some time to make up this list...which i guess is pretty pathetic considering its been a year already and we haven't been able to think of anything else. at least we're active....very active.